I am three days shy of having been back in America for one month and I have no idea what I’m doing. Moving back in to my old house didn’t require too much adjustment, although it did take me a good three weeks to fully unpack and organize. For some reason I irrationally thought that unpacking my things meant I would be locked into staying in Ohio. Totally not the case. If anything, it means that when I can move it will be easier to find everything to pack up.
Getting back into the swing of American life has not been a big obstacle so far, but I haven’t really gotten out much since I’ve been back. Tipping at restaurants does feel weird, though.
My main issue is that it still feels like a summer break from school. I GRADUATED ALMOST A YEAR AGO WHY DO I STILL FEEL LIKE THIS? Transition periods suck, but I know I will continue to be stuck in said period until I can officially begin my career, not just a job. I have been feeling waif-like; just floating around with no set life structure. I don’t need a rigid schedule, but I do like to have some constructs in my life. Most of my life, I was dedicated to going to Italy and I achieved that dream three times over! But I made the mistake of not really thinking long-term, when it comes to my career goals. I know I want to be an event planner/ coordinator, but where and in what capacity? I am still waiting for something that motivates me as much as going to Italy. Whether that is a job, a relationship, or a place, I can only wait to find out.
I’m learning that you don’t have to stick it out once you make a decision. You are allowed to change your mind. This is not me saying you have carte blanche to flake out on your commitments, but if you truly believe that you made a mistake then you have the right to do something about it. That being said, never make a decision lightly. Do you think I made the decision to return to the United States at the drop of a hat? It was one of the most difficult choices I’ve ever had to make and I know I will always wonder if I made the right decision.
On top of all this, I’m not sure what I want to do with this blog. I know I want to keep it going, but I’m not sure what my focus will be on. So please bear with me! I do appreciate everyone who takes time out of their day to read my blog!